What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian?
1. How strong could your feelings REALLY be if you were not aware they were a lesbian?
I suppose if it's a family member or something there is not much you can do.
If it's someone you were interested in dating, then first your feelings were not THAT strong. And secondly, sounds like you won't be dating them any time soon.
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Is it that one chick that was your gf or whatever and she moved away and you seen her sometime later at a carnival or something rather and you thought it was ment to be? or was that not you
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I used to be involved with her, about four or five years ago. She was one of the only two women I have ever been in love with, and she was forced to move away with her parents, she just recently moved back to go to school here for the nursing program or something, and we bumped into eachother, literally, in a sea of about 15,000 people. Its just tough to feel everything, pretty much all over again, but alas, tomorow is cinco de mayo, so that might be all the reason I need
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Joined: 4/3/2004 From: Louisville, Ky Status: offline
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ORIGINAL: 2000AZ5.0GT
What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
its a sexual preference. nothing more. get over it. Being gay is NOT a big deal nor is any other sexual preference. I like japanese school girls FTW
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I am really, really sure that isn't the case. I was actually going to go for a drive tonight to reflect on this type of stuff, and ended up going to dinner with her and her, well, "friend", and it was blatently obvious.
What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
its a sexual preference. nothing more. get over it. Being gay is NOT a big deal nor is any other sexual preference. I like japanese school girls FTW
oh yeah, that really helps, I already said its not something I can just "get over". If the girl I was seeing liked big black men, but was still with me, thats something I could "get over", or lets say I got a thorn in my foot, that kind of thing, I could just "get over", this is more than either of those things.
I don't necessarily know that you would understand, but the world of intillect, or my career, is absolutely no problem for me. I'm good at these things, and it's not something I worry about, neither is staying in shape. The only thing I actually have to think about is my personal life, which has seemed to go down the sh*tter proverbially speaking, considering I just ended my engagement a little while ago, and this just happened, its alot to deal with. if you don't have something productive to say, please just move on, don't clutter up the thread with useless garbage telling me something I didn't ask for, nor is required. It's not like your lecturing, or giving advice, your just being an ass in this case, so please just move on
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Joined: 6/14/2007 From: SC, New Mexico Status: offline
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I am really, really sure that isn't the case. I was actually going to go for a drive tonight to reflect on this type of stuff, and ended up going to dinner with her and her, well, "friend", and it was blatently obvious.
I'm telling you man, cut communication with her. It's 100% easier to get over someone when you don't have to see/talk to them.
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Joined: 4/3/2004 From: Louisville, Ky Status: offline
if your not married to her or in love with her it should be easy to move on. many fish in the sea. get over it.
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Don''''t be too proud of this technological terror you''''ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of Big Oil.
What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
its a sexual preference. nothing more. get over it. Being gay is NOT a big deal nor is any other sexual preference. I like japanese school girls FTW
His post wasn't anti-homosexual at all. He wasn't bad talking them or saying it was wrong. But when a girl you care about is a lesbian, then that means you are ****fed. She isn't going to want you, no matter what you do, because you don't have a vadge.
And yeah, if my girlfriend suddenly told me she was a lesbian, it would be a big deal. Yeah, there are alot of other fish in the sea, but they aren't the ones I want obviously. When you have that attachment to someone, you don't think about how you will be able to find someone else. You can't just acknoledge that it's not the end of the world and find comfort in that. It really sucks.
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Joined: 10/10/2005 From: brunstank ga Status: offline
i had a friend who thought she was gay, went off to college in NY and realized she wasn't. imho a lot of people do that crap for attention nothing more
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What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
its a sexual preference. nothing more. get over it. Being gay is NOT a big deal nor is any other sexual preference. I like japanese school girls FTW
His post wasn't anti-homosexual at all. He wasn't bad talking them or saying it was wrong. But when a girl you care about is a lesbian, then that means you are ****fed. She isn't going to want you, no matter what you do, because you don't have a vadge.
And yeah, if my girlfriend suddenly told me she was a lesbian, it would be a big deal. Yeah, there are alot of other fish in the sea, but they aren't the ones I want obviously. When you have that attachment to someone, you don't think about how you will be able to find someone else. You can't just acknoledge that it's not the end of the world and find comfort in that. It really sucks.
Well, I'm glad that someone understands it. I love how people usually say "ah, just get over it, its no big deal" and yet, if they were in the same situation, they would act completely different, and think about it in a completely different way. now granted, I think that there are some people who don't understand how much love means in life, or have a different perspective on how much it means in life, but you guy's have to understand, I really had deep feelings for this girl.
I mean, I havn't talked to her enough lately to find out whether or not it's a practical decision, or she if she is just attracted to other women, or what it is, and I guess I really don't care.
ITS MORALLY WRONG TO JUST COMPLETELY STOP TALKING TO HER if its just because I can't get with her, especially for that reason. She has always meant a lot to me, and if the only choice I have is to have her as a good friend, than as nothing at all, I would much rather take the former. Even if it's painful to me, if its right, thats what I have to do, I cannot do something just because it makes it easier for me. A great man once said "you will soon have to make a choice between whats easy, and whats easy......", at the moment, there are 6 shots in the way of me remembering exactly who it is, but I can't in good concious stop talking to her.
I should clarify at this point, that while yes, I was in love with her, that means that I can love her, and not be in love with her. I know that its a completely retarded idea, but I now sit here, and while I do have feelings for her, I also care and love her as a friend, which came first when I knew her 4 or 5 years ago anyway, so just because I have to get over these "more than friend" feelings, isn't a good reason for just getting rid of her.
At this point, you could also realize that, the hardest part of having these feelings is doing the morally right thing to do, which is to be a good friend. however long ago it was, we were very close friends, and there is still that connection there of being more than just an aquantiance, and actually caring about eachother, and I guess that it not being anything more than a plutonic feeling for her is just something I will have to deal with. This brings about the point about why I really feel ****ty, which is because I, whereas most people don't, think about more than just today or tomorow, but about three or four, even thirty years down the line. While I know that I may not feel the same way about her, as being more than a friend, in a year or however long it takes, I do feel that way now, and I do know that at some point, she will find someone that she is truely in love with, regardless of the fact that it might be a woman.
If you have ever had feelings, or loved, or been in love with someone that was in love with someone else, no matter what gender they are, it hurts, and depending on how empathetic it is, and how well you can think about hypothetical situations, you realize how bad it's going to feel.
It's not something I can just "shrug off", its a big deal, and I was asking if I could use a little smirnoff to take the edge off of the problem, not the advice on the situation. Either way, drinking or not, I'm going to be a good friend to her, and a close friend to her, because thats who I am, I just want to know the easiest way to transition from having feelings for her, and being just a friend to her
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Joined: 4/23/2006 From: Las Vegas Status: offline
quote:
ORIGINAL: 2000AZ5.0GT
What would you guys do if someone you really had feelings for told you they were a lesbian? I mean, its pretty big, not something to just "get over", I don't even think doctor phil would say to just get over it. anyway, to drink, or not to drink, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the heart.....
Not trying to sound ****ed up or anything but how about you look at it this way. Maybe she doesnt wana date u or thinks you're not the guy for her and she told you that(if thats your case). Believe me women can do some crazy unthinkable ****. I learned my lessons. I kno how u feel about that bro and its hard as **** to get over it.
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